User blog:M.A.T.S.H/Epic Rap Battles Disney VS History- Roger Rabbit VS The Angel
I am nothing if not a man of my word. Welcome to to the Easter Special of Epic Rap Battles- Disney VS History. Today, we have a battle of 2 characters from live action/animation hybrids that strangely competed with each other at the box office. Roger Rabbit from his titular film faces off against The Angel from the trippy movie In The Aftermath to see which one is superior. Also, it's a bunny against a messiah figure for Easter. Get it? Beat: Angel Intro EPIC RAP BATTLES! DISNEY! VS! HISTORY! ROGER RABBIT VS THE ANGEL BEGIN! Roger Rabbit (0:20) Can anyone p-p-p-p-please tell me what the hell this chick’s even about? You live in a LSD trip mixed with Sunday school! You’re sure to lose this bout While you’re locked up in your own dimension, I’m creating laughter for generations I can’t wait to hear your lyrics; I bet they’re as static and confusing as your animation! A laugh’s the only thing that’s worthwhile in life! Looks like you’ve got nothing to live for If you didn’t goof around with fountains and statues, maybe you could have rescued more I’m hanging out with the biggest toon stars while you’re staring at a Mad Max clone You're paler than your phantom whalers! Not to mention you're so morose! No wonder Oshii went down the tubes for a decade after you! I’ve come to this conclusion- Because your movie was the worst handling of an anime until Dragonball Evolution! The Angel (0:53) As I walk through the shadows of this vast galaxy of gray, I puzzle at this Oswald knockoff that is clearly clinically insane. Even if I bestowed my knowledge upon you, you still couldn’t get a life. Your best friends are a baby and a loudmouth car. You’re overshadowed by your wife. And there’s another thing I should tell you before you decide to continue this. I spoke to The Astral Traveler. He told me that your movie was more disturbing for children! You can be thwarted by a little bit of turpentine. I’ve lived since time immortal. But don’t worry. Like your dance craze, my raps will be short and yet hurtful. How do I know all this, you ask? Why, you wouldn’t even believe me if I told you. My egg trembles at your very presence. Its divine Judgement has spelt your Doom. Roger Rabbit (1:15) I don’t need to diss you when your fanatic of a brother does it for me! I can beat you anytime I want! But I can only do it when you’re not funny! It’s easy to see why this Maroon’s so depressed after looking at your flooded dregs! You’re too sinful to be an angel! You drowned yourself when you cracked more than your egg! The Angel (1:25) Angels Never Sleep but your banal cartoons are the only things that make me drowsy! I’ll wash you away like the rains I control. All my power before you and you still can’t see. The afterlife that I live in is nothing compared to the awful knockoffs your success created. You still want to go on with this? Very well. We shall see who wins with the voices of real men. The backgrounds melt and change to 1940s San Francisco and an atomic wasteland, respectfully. Eddie Valiant shows up with Roger and Frank shows up with The Angel Eddie Valiant (1:37) Keep that radiation suit on; you’ll need it to deal with the fallout from my disses! Try pointing that rusted rifle at me and you’ll be sleeping with the shadow fishes! So, Roger Corman’s company couldn’t make a B-Movie without scrambling some Angel Eggs You know what we do to creeps who chase children? You’ll be lucky to leave with your legs I’ll cook your Goose like your partner; your psycho survivors don’t scare me at all Then I’ll rip that gun right out of your hands and shoot you straight in the- NOSE! Frank (1:49) Well, I can’t trust anybody in this wasteland! You must be mad from the shit you just spat! Put your hands up! You’re crazier than the soldiers I fight for oxygen with, you know that?! I’ve stepped over corpses that looked better! In the aftermath, a guy like you wouldn’t live You wouldn’t be anywhere without that animation! You’re just Chinatown without Nicholson! My rapping and piano skills are harder than the one that crushed your brother’s head Now you spend your days curled up in a bottle; you should have been a plumber instead I’m already sick of these freaks. Is there anything else you need me to do, little girl? The Angel (2:01): Just take this egg. With its power, you can end up making a New World… Outro (2:10): Who won?! Who’s next?! YOU DECIDE! EPIC! RAP! BATTLES! DISNEY VS HISTORY! Who won? Roger Rabbit & Eddie Valiant The Angel & Frank Category:Blog posts